In this article I'm going to show you How To Wake Up Her "Naughtiness"!
Sexuality in long distance relationships is one of those things that are so private, that you won't really find much quality advice around the internet about it. This is the reason why I decided to take a few pages and share with you some of my best ideas on how to have a better sexual life "online" with your partner.
We humans are sexual beings. We use sex for reproduction, we use it for pleasure, we use it for fun, we use it for expressing our feelings, for health and so on. So unless you're asexual or dedicated to religion, then sex is an important part of your life, and satisfying your sexual needs is probably an issue that takes a lot of time and energy in your life, especially if you're young.
Now, besides sexuality being a physical need, it also represents an important component of a romantic relationship. I believe we can all agree that sex is vital for a relationship to be satisfying, happy and overall to be a "complete relationship".
When it comes to long distance relationships, things can get a bit more complicated.
Given the circumstances, we're not able to satisfy our sexual desires to the fullest, but we can still have a somewhat fulfilling sexual life.
And in this article I am going to share with you how you can enjoy a satisfying sexual life even from distance, how to get your girlfriend comfortable with online sex, and how to keep things nice and sexy over the whole period of your relationship.
First things first - Your Sexual Anxiety.
If you want a girl to be comfortable having sex with you, be it in normal circumstances or online in long distance relationships - You have to be comfortable with your sexuality first!
The big problem is that most guys think that sex is something dirty, that it is so hard to get a girl to have sex, and that women don't really enjoy sex that much. Because of these beliefs and many others, guys feel uncomfortable expressing their sexuality, and when they do it, they do it in a very weak and insecure manner. So the problem is that they have sexual anxiety.
And guess what? That's why they never get laid, or they don't succeed to get their girlfriends comfortable having online sex with them.
The issue with sexual anxiety is a very important issue to be discussed, but I don't have enough space in this article to go too much into detail about it.
That's why I am going to give you just one great suggestion:
1) Figure out what are you current beliefs about sex.
Take out a paper and write down everything that comes to mind (at least 10 beliefs), starting the sentences with the following expression: "I believe that sex is... "
2) Identify the negative sex beliefs.
See if any of those beliefs are geared towards negative thinking about sex, and highlight them. As a rule of thumb, a negative belief about sex is any belief that could make you feel uncomfortable in a given situation to: talk about sex, express your sexual desires, take your clothes off, have sex, and express your sexual pleasure during the process.
An example could be: "I believe that sex is something that girls don't like to talk about". Now this is the furthest thing from reality. Girls love talking about sex; they just like to do it with a man that is comfortable with his sexuality, a man that can be somewhat trusted, and a man that knows how to talk about sex.
3) Replace these beliefs with positive ones.
So, now that you highlighted your negative sexual beliefs, make sure to eliminate them. And you do that by thinking of all the situations where your beliefs proved to be wrong in the past. In could be in your experience or in the experience of other people, or in movies or in books etc. but you want to find proof that your beliefs are not true!
Okay, so now that you're comfortable with your own sexuality. Then it's time to talk about getting your girlfriend comfortable with her sexuality.
Second Things Second - Getting Her Comfortable With Her Sexuality
As I said before, women might seem very restrictive about sex, it could seem like they don't like it, or they don't like talking about it, or they don't like being a little "dirty" from time to time.
If you'd read the book "My Secret Garden" by Nancy Friday where she presents dozens of anonymous sexual fantasies that women have, then you'd REALIZE how dirty women can really be, given the right circumstances.
So in your long distance relationship, if you want your girlfriend to like talking to you about sex, to agree to show you her body on the camera, to enjoy having online sex with you, then you need to get her comfortable and create those "right circumstances".
From my experience, getting your girlfriend comfortable to be sexual with you online would mean to meet the following 4 requirements:
1) She needs to know that you are comfortable about it.
(That's why this was the first step)
So what you want to do is to tell her about your beliefs regarding sex. In your conversations don't be afraid to lead the topic towards sex, and talk about it in a free and relaxed manner.
- Let her know that you think that sex is a natural part of a relationship, and it makes the relationship a complete experience.
- Let her know that you love having sex with her and that you miss her body over yours, so much!
- Let her know that you understand that sex for women is a sensitive subject, because of society having these unfair rules of putting labels on women that express themselves sexually.
- Let her know that you think that it's okay if a woman expresses herself sexually with a person that she can trust, thus with her boyfriend. And it's totally fine if does it too, as long as she does it only with you, and not with any other people.
So you want to let her know that you're comfortable, so that she can be comfortable too. She needs to know that you're okay with it, and you won't change your opinion about her if she does it, or you won't judge her for doing it.
2) She needs to trust you.
Here I am not talking about the kind of trust that you "won't sleep with other women".
Here I am talking about the kind of trust that you will be able to keep a secret, you won't share nude pictures with her online, or won't tell others about you actually "having online sex", and in general that what happens between you two will stay between you, and only you.
Sexuality is a private thing, and it needs to stay that way, if you want her to feel comfortable with you.
Now, normally it's assumed that if you're in a relationship that you are a trustworthy person, and there shouldn't be such discussions. But, still in the back of her mind she'll be worried about such things.
But if she's comfortable being sexual with you online, without bringing up this issue, then you don't have to bring it up either. Then it means that you're a trustworthy person and she doesn't worry about it.
However, if she refuses to be sexual with you, then I suggest that you talk to her about it assuring her that you're a responsible and trustworthy person.
AND BE SINCERE! I mean, you really have to be a responsible person in this case, because some inappropriate pictures "being lost" or "being taken" without your knowledge and appearing somewhere online is not just DAMAGING for the relationship, but it means that you'd be a big asshole that has no brains. These actions are punishable by law, so don't ever think about doing such things! (I don't mean to insult you, but if someone would do such things, then he'd deserve these words, and not only!)
So again, how do make sure that she trusts you?
- Keep your promises when you promise something.
- Never reveal any inside secrets to anybody.
- Talk about this issue and assure her that you're trustworthy.
- Make an agreement to keep these things safe.
- Tell her that "trust" in this case is a two ways issue; you also have to trust her, that she'll keep the pictures or videos that could be taken in the process, safe. And when she sees that you're also worried about this issue, then she'll feel much more relaxed about it.
Nothing complicated, just common sense tips that will actually surprise you, how effective they are.
3) She needs to be willing to "satisfy" you.
You see, online sex is not as pleasing for her as it is for you as a man. While you can masturbate during the process and arrive pretty easily to an orgasm, she can't really do the same.
It's harder for women to feel satisfied after having online sex, so there's less interest for her to do it, plus all those risks involved...
Now, the solution here is that she needs to have the attitude of "I want to make him happy!"
This way, she'll agree to be sexual with you just to keep you satisfied and happy, because that's what good, loving girlfriends do.
There are two tips though, that I can give you to make her more enthusiastic about it:
- Let her know that sex for you is something important, and being sexually satisfied is an important part of your relationship. And the fact that you're not close to each other makes it even harder for you. So spending some "sexy time" together online from time to time is your only consolation.
- Keeping you "satisfied" will ensure that you're always faithful and you won't look for other means of satisfying your sexual needs. (thus one more incentive for her)
4) She needs to ENJOY the process.
Isn't it weird? I have just finished telling you that there's not much pleasure for her if she "plays dirty" with you online, and now I am telling you that she should enjoy the process...
It might sound weird, but it isn't. What I meant before was that she needs to genuinely care about your "satisfaction", so that she can please you online anytime you "feel the need".
However, what I mean here is that you still have to give her an enjoyable experience. It might not necessarily be in terms of physical pleasure, but it could be in many other ways.
She might enjoy it when:
*** Seeing you so happy and satisfied and getting so much pleasure from seeing her on the camera. Therefore make sure to express your emotions, feelings and sensations when she takes her clothes off. (she'll love it, I can guarantee you that!)
*** When receiving tons of compliments from you. They could be about her sexy body, her perfect breasts, her beautiful legs, etc. This is "the benefit" for her! This is what's in it for her, more than anything else.
So you must make her feel good about it, give her sincere compliments, talk a little dirty to her, make her feel like she's the most special and the sexiest woman in the world. If you do that, she'll be happy to show you her perfect breasts and anything else any time you want to see them.
Even though she might not have a perfect body, or she might be insecure about some of her body parts, you have to comfort her and let her know that it doesn't bother you, and you still love her, and they actually make her more special and unique. Now, you don't have to lie to her, but sometimes you could also keep some of your critique for yourself.
*** When you encourage her to play with herself. Encourage her to free up her mind and be in the moment. Encourage her to relax and imagine that it's you who is touching her, so that she can feel the physical pleasure as much as possible.
So let's make a short recap...
We are sexual beings, thus sex is a natural part of our lives.
Sex is a vital part of a relationship, be it a classic relationship or a long distance relationship, it plays an important role in keeping the partners happy and satisfied.
If you want to persuade your girlfriend to express her sexuality online with you, then you need to:
1) Handle your own sexual anxiety first.
2) Get her comfortable being sexual online with you.
You can get her comfortable by meeting the following four requirements:
- She needs to know that you're comfortable.
- She needs to trust you.
- She needs to want to "satisfy" you.
- She needs to enjoy the experience.
Final Note
The suggestions that I gave you in this article are basic and fundamental. Without understanding these basic principles no matter what other stuff you'd try, they won't lead to consistent, un-rejectable, pressure less and enjoyable sexual experiences online.
Of course, there are many more advanced techniques to get a girl naked fast and easy in front of the camera, but those are not very suitable to be exposed just like that in public.
While these suggestions are very effective, they might require that you are also a little more creative about the matter, so that you make it easier and more enjoyable for her to get a little naughty with you, from time to time.
Feel free to be creative and express your desires with your girl. Tell her what do, how to stand, what to show you, how to show it to you. Teach her how to please you online, and if you do it right she'll be happy to do it, and you'll both enjoy the experience.
Congrats! You just became more knowledgeable about how women feel about expressing their sexuality online. So use this information with care, and make your long distance relationship more "sexy, naughty and hotty*"!
With Great Respect,
Livius
I have created the most unique and specific website/blog dedicated entirely to MEN IN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP.
On this website you'll find real solutions to real problems like: preventing infidelity, handling fights, having better and more interesting conversations, keeping your woman attracted and even addicted to you.
I call it the place where your get: No Bullshit Advice On How To Keep Your Girlfriend Addicted To You In A Long Distance Relationship!
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